Leftover Chinese Uses a Screwdriver

Today's Lesson: Changing a Door Knob.


Door Knob ends. Missing: broken cylinder.

The landlord is slow to act on minor repairs. He's pretty good about the major things, but the little things tend to happen by themselves. I've got a good deal going, so I don't mind working a few issues on my own. I could use these lessons down the line. Tonight I replaced a door knob.


Step 1. Insert New Cylinder. Take a few peeks through the door hole.


Step 2: Align outside knob with inside knob. Try not to snap anything.


Step 3: Align and fasten Knob ends. Make sure everything is lined up and give the knob a few test turns. Note how solid the door feels when the knobs pins are screwed tight. Tighten door knob screws throughout the apartment. Curse yourself for getting used to loose door knobs.

Next Much Neglected Home Project: Shopping for a Microwave.

Tip for the day: Walk around your house and tighten them knobs.

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Leftover Chinese Goes Home for a Few Days


Turkey was easy. Turkey was good. Turkey was plentiful. I've taken a picture of every turkey since 1995. I should put those together one of these days. Just me and the parents got together to eat, talk, and push each others buttons. Love them holidays.


Then I scored a 289-283 non-internet victory in scrabble. I just wanted to throw those points up. I was dealt tiles to form the worst band name ever.


Got some dry, powdery snow the next day. It made a night out in Milwaukee much quieter than I expected. I hung with someone I hadn't seen or even hung out with in a long time. We actually had the "what have you done the past nine years" conversation. Everybody has a story to tell.


I took my old man to the Bucks game. The Bucks lost and dad was sacrificed his first evening in front of the a new DLP widescreen TV to brave the cold. It was a fun time. I get a lot of hard looks from people when I'm wearing my stocking cap. It's wierd.

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Twenty Seven

I don't feel any different. I still feel like I could go home to my parents house, get in the mini-van (now gone) and drive in circles around Wauwatosa, WI with my slacker friends...everybody has grown up now, so that ain't happening...

Since I've moved to this city, every year has felt just about the same. Everybody around me is getting more responsible and adult. I'm just riding the wave. Big thanks go out to my friends who came out Tuesday night to have a drink with me. I tried to toast them without sounding like an ass. At last night's show I got to blow candles out on a cake. It great having these people around me. Life's been really fun the last few years.

When I hit twenty-six last year (as opposed to two years ago), I decided to stop watching my life go by and take charge. I did things like get myself into shape, work on not being so anti-social, and take charge of what was going on around me. Turns out a lot of good happened in the past year. I figure 'stay the course' on this one and keep things rolling. One year older means I should starting thinking ahead, right? The plan is still to not have a set pan and so far it's worked. Have a good turkey day, folks.

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Leftoverchinese Doesn't Illustrate a Weekend

Independent Hip-Hop artist Cage put on a good show Friday night. He doesn't look like a rapper at all. After the show, a few gentlemen of apparent latino descent proudly proclaimed that White kids like Cage. This comment was directed at us...I guess I was exempt from this comment. Once the kids realized that, one guy shook my head and said: "Right on, but you gotta admit...White people love Cage." I'm not sure where the rest of the conversation went. It was strange. I mean...they were at the show, too.

Continuing the recent trend of watching 1970's Cinema on a weekend night: The Warriors. As violent as the movie was, they sure used some clean looking guys as the scrappy band of underdogs. I'd like to see a band cover the movie's score sometime...or at least hear about it happening. They should have made this a video game years ago.

I ran on the treadmill for the first time in almost a year. It felt strangely good I'm going to try running again...Outside.

Do those super target commercials imply that you can get your produce and wardrobe from the same place, or do they imply that you can get everything other than food at their stores?

Staying on the race card, my dad introduced me to the music of KC Williams. I guess Mr. Williams is a longtime patient of my father who only recently disclosed to my dad that he is in fact a country singer. I think my involvement in the music game my dad something to relate back. KC jokingly (or not so jokingly) told my father that in order to break out to the big time, he should be of different skin color. The guy gets to sing the national anthem at a Bucks game as well as the anthem at Lambeau Field in January. My mom bought his cd. I burned a copy for myself. He needs a song about insane debauchery to put him on the map. I'm going to give a copy to my neighbor Miller.

Despite fighting a cold, I feel pretty good right now.

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Leftover Chinese Remembers this Random Fact

When I was growing up, there was a kid who lived in the neighborhood that we couldn't tolerate. Despite living pretty close to the guy, we never made the effort to hang out with him...at least I never did. He was the kid who had you over so you could watch him play Nintendo. He was a strange kid, nerdier than the nerdy kids and arrogant about how smart he was. He was the kid with the Mary Kay mother who looked like her skin was made of a white cotton sheet. His name is John Moser and today is his birthday. I haven't seen the kid since high school and had minimal contact with the guy growing up, but I can't seem to shake knowing his birthday. Happy birthday where/whoever you are.

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Leftover Chinese Falls asleep on the Train then addresses old Business

After discovering that I mistakenly threw away today's crossword puzzle commute, I opted to rest my eyes for a few stops. I woke up at the usual stop but decided that I was going to change trains. Half-asleep, I pulled myself to the door then tossed the questions/comments in my head: 1) "Wait, which stop is this?" 2) "What train am I on?" (which line) 3) "Did I transfer to get to this train?" 4) "If I sit back down, will I wind up in Evanston?" 5) "Wait...this is my train." 6) "Ooops."


Reposted. A month and a half ago, I stumbled upon this chicken shack and made a comment about the cartoon chicken offering chicken legs. Natalie reminded me on the last post that I never commented on the chicken. The chicken is right. His legs taste damn good. Throw on a bean stew and some Spanish rice, you got yourself one hell of a meal. I'd drive the distance to take it back home.

Then I remembered Natalie made a comment about how I take pictures of my dinner. This is what I did with a forty-five minute window.


Diced porkchops, onion, mushrooms, broccoli, sauce, and pepper.

...and now the apartment smells.

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Leftover Chinese Doesn't go Anywhere

What if I continue to title every post in third person? I'd be referring to myself in third person. I'm getting wierder.


The Volcano

When I wasn't going anywhere Friday night, I wound up in River Grove, IL for some tropical drinks and conversation at a Tiki Bar. The first few minutes featured some bad-vibe time but once the jukebox started quietly pumping out Phil Collins live, everything was all good. I thought about introducing myself as Don Ho's long lost son, but the joke was only funny once. Good times and extremely sugary cocktails if you can make the trip. One the way to and from, you'll learn that strip mall parking lots are THE place to hang out.


Soup's Stove

When I wasn't going anywhere today, I enjoyed a homecooked thanksgiving meal at Nic, Nate & Sam's house. Turkey, potatoes, corn, beans, beer, football on the TV, conversations about food, and R. Kelly's Trapped the Closet (chapters 1-12...twice)...let the eating season begin.

Etc

We watched an episode of Elimidate "unchained" where two women 'eliminated' their pool of dates to one...then the one guy gets to choose between the two. On one such episode, two women pared the field down to one. He had them back to his house, then before he knew it, the women were in a full on fight. He chose to eliminate himself. Classic. There has to be a way to combine this show with Cheaters.

Last night, I stayed in the house and upgraded the wireless router in my apartment. I managed to get everything fired up and working property without the help of any of my tech friends. I can lay in bed and play Family Feud online at a marginally faster transfer rate!

At lunch in Chinatown, my brother and I had an unnecessary amount to eat. There's something about the food that makes you eat past the point of uncomfortable. At the table next us sat a family with a father who wore sunglasses like these. The man, a lanky leather-clad Caucasian, was overly touchy-feely with his Asian wife. While she and her son were in the bathroom, he spent an uncomfortable amount of time checking out the women who sat at the table behind him. It was a really creepy case of the ol' Asian fetish. Not good. Then I learned that this city's Chinatown is much quieter than last week's version.

I'm getting closer and closer to wanting a full compliment of Cable channels. So little to watch...

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Leftover Chinese gets back into "Normal" life...Then Reveals Stuff


Tie. Honestly Pointless Saddle bag. Dress Shirt...I must be part of the downtown workforce. Back to the cookie cutter job and wondering why the hell I sit in a cube all day. On the flipside, as part of the recovery from tour, I spent a Tuesday and Wednesday night at home alone...for the first time since february. It felt really wierd to have nowhere to be for two consecutive nights.

I'll be honest with you. As miserable as the day job may feel, I get the occasional day where I feel lucky to be where I am. I continue to do things atypical of the go-getters my age, but I still hold down the job and my services still seem to be wanted.

(Back when I had real cable, that Stella show made its debut on comedy central. One of the episodes was about how the guys took job and "got the big account." Everybody was psyched. Their satire on what happens when the big deal closes is pretty accurate.)

Today, my bosses "closed the big deal." It's so big that I should be angry that I'll see none of the money that was made. I'll keep my mouth shut and go about the job the same way I've always been going about it, though. I'm not going to mess with a decent situation. Case in point:

So yesterday I get back from tour to find out about the aforementioned "big deal." Rather than tell me what I should get back to taking care of, I'm told to clear this evening because the top office dog wants to congratulate us with a meal.

Today, I slept in and got to work in time to miss a weekly client conference call. But I had a tie...so I was serious about getting to work late. Nothing was mentioned of the mis-step.

Dinner featured the bossmen, the bossmen's co-hort, the co-worker, the top office dog, and the office money-maker. The office-money-maker decided to make me the target of his humor. Besides a congratulation for finally conforming to how others around me dress, he thanked me for getting rid of the moustache and also used the term "screwed up the numbers" as a joking reference to an episode we had in 2004...multiple times. I won't say anything more about that. After dinner, one of the bossman sheepishly apologized for the money-maker's behavior and looked genuinely embarrassed and angry on my behalf. At the same time, I didn't really care about the condescending and borderline insulting ribbing. Assholes will be assholes. It comes with the territory. This fucking job isn't my life.

To top it all off, the end of the night featured an insistence to bring my golf clubs to work tomorrow. There's a chance I'll get a shot at a really, really, exclusive course...but I doubt it.

I don't know how I get myself into these situations...

[post edit: no golf for me]

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Leftover Chinese Comes Back from Vacation

So I spent the last five days with the same five people...





We spent a lot of time in this van full of gear driving, sleeping, reading and talking all kinds of nonsense...all for the sake of playing music in front of people.


A few hours after a marthon overnight drive to Maryland, we showed up in Washington D.C. on what began an unseasonably warm weekend. You could smell the freedom.


One city later, we decided to take a surreal walk through a portion of Central Park in New York City. It was warm, sunny, and perfect for a nap on that big grassy meadow.


That same city and a day later, we saluted America again from one of the many famous bridges.


The we got back in the van and made the trip back to Chicago feeling sad that it was all over and done.

Notables

Pennsylvania features plenty of winding roads. The sun slowly rose and we found ourselves right at the peak of fall colors. It was like winding up in candyland.

Of all places I could have been hoodwinked: Arby's. The smooth talking man upcharged us for a large box of fries simply by asking "(large) curly fries with that?"

Of all the places I dealt with ignorant strangers: Chinatown NYC. One woman shopping at a store asked me how much something was. She repeated the question a few times and got louder each time. Eventually, I had to tell her that I didn't work there. A few minutes later we were walking down a street and a Latter Day Saint picked me out of the group of friends to say "nihao."

Gracious hosting from Tracy in DC and Matt and Tamar in New York. They get much thanks for putting up with our shit.

Good food and bad food alike...highlights included Ben's Chili Bowl in DC, Junior's in Brooklyn and of course, Arbys. I even had a taco salad. Although bars are expensive in New York, it doesn't make more sense to drink straight Whiskey to save money.

The train stations in Washington DC look straight out of Logan's Run. The train stations in New York aren't as bad as they look on TV.

Touring is fun.

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Leftover Chinese goes on Vacation

Tomorrow night. Good times.

The Bucks came from behind to win their first game. The NBA season begins and I'm going to try to follow this without cable tv. Good luck.

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