The forty Nine Hour Weekend: 2004 Edition


Crowds...cops...lots of cops.


Costumes...costumes and the phrase "Fuck You. Fuck You. I'm Punk Rock."


Create a prop and watch half the people miss the joke over and over again.


Cloud

The second consecutive weekend journey to Dane County featured the seventh annual Halloween celebration. In 1997, I woke up too hungover to put a costume together. Two hours before going out, I drove to Goodwill to buy some old looking clothes so I could pass as someone...from the past. In 2004, I sewed a cloud from Super Mario Brothers in less than two days with only a few self-inflicted wounds. Ah, how far we've gone. A lot of other events transpired as well. I guess you could say it was a fitting end to Moustache Month and its awesome power.

- In the process of preparing my Halloween costume, I wound up making a journey to the Dollar Tree. I walked into the store and as I neared the wall of spatulas, I noticed that the PA speakers had been emitting crazy sounding dissonant chords. The store was playing a 'Sounds of Halloween' CD over the PA...really, really, loud. At one point I had to step away from underneath a PA speaker because the screaming banshee sound was too intense. Amidst the loud sounds of hissing cats, laughing ghosts, and evil-ish organ music, I could hear babies crying and kids making pleas to their parents to stay close. I looked at the employees and none of them looked the least bit unsettled by this. I walked into the store expecting to drop a dollar. I walked away empty-handed, slightly freaked-out, and with a new-found appreciation for the dollar stores of America.

- I saw Mouse on Mars and Ratatat on Friday night. I feel a little overloaded on that type of music right now but it was a good show. The auditorium acoustics sucked the energy out of the music, but people still danced, kids tossed glow-sticks around, and some girl shook her head at Amanda's red wig. Entertainment quota met.

- Friends and well-wishers not in my Friendster network will probably not understand a word of the previous paragraph. I'm not sure what that means yet.

- The stakes this time around in Madison were much different. We're all a year older, and most of our friends have moved out of the city. Instead of rapping at 1am to a bunch of confused looks, we relaxed in a quiet bar and made only a few tours around the street. The pictures basically capture the fun of the visit. If this is the last Madison Halloween bash for us, I'm glad it went down as a great time.

- Since 2002, every visit to Madison with friends goes like this: we go out; we come back late; we decide to order a pizza at 2:30 am; then we sit and wait while people pass out one by one until the pizza shows up just before 4am. I usually come back to life for a few slices, then return to sleep. In the morning, half the pokey stix are still there. I don't think this practice will ever end.

- I didn't hit me how much of a battleground state Wisconsin is/was until I saw vandalized Kerry campaign signs in my hometown. To see this in a city that prides itself as an 'elite suburb' doesn't surprise me. Things can get funny at times in town built on a swamp. I come from the same city where 10 years ago, the then-mayor once said a certain strip-mall in a diverse corner of the city was 'Schmucksville.' Damn my camera and it's battery eating power.

- According to my dad, the democrats are to blame for the rise in single-parent families, the Aids rate, and just about anything morally wrong with America. I said back: "I heard that the decay of values are the exact same reasons Muslim countries hate America..." I'm always trying to make unique points when I answer back to my dad. That went right over his neo-conservative(read: extreme distaste for Muslims in general) head and I couldn't illustrate my point. After he equated democrats to the devil and said something about how it's bad that I'm starting to think like a democrat, I had to drop the issue. After a while, you can't argue with somebody completely convinced by what they see as the truth because you see everything in a completely different light...and that's how I experienced the polarization of America. How did it happen?

- The cloud costume got bonus mileage as I delivered candy to the trick-or-treaters at the house. Not as many kids knocked on the door as I expected based on the noise in the street. Most kids didn't even bother to say trick-or-treat. One Asian girl showed up by herself and it looked as if her friends were avoiding my parent's house. Adding to the fun was the fact that most kids laughed at the cloud. Only one girl got the video game reference. Two lessons here: (1) kids aren't as clueless as everybody older thinks they are; and (2) I think my parents are turning into the scary old couple in the dark house whom kids are scared of. If only they'd socialize...

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Word Association



See that arrow? I had sex for the first time in that house. Yeah, yeah...do the math...I was twenty years old at the time...but I digress...I'm not exactly sure why that thought was the first thing to come to mind when I saw this picture, but think back on your own experience. Were any political rallies ever held near your first scene of awkward carnal knowledge?

In the living room of that apartment, I learned about America's impeachment process. West Wash didn't host a rally for that one.

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What if pictures were captions and captions were pictures? Don't think too hard on that one. I hear the pictures are called "figures" in that situation. I've some digital photography to get off my chest.


The first items to take a bath in the fryer.


I was pulling apart a plant of bok choy sum when I found flowers. This suprised me. I have never seen/eaten these leaves before.


If I had my camera at the time, I would have taken a picture of the severed doll part I saw on the floor of the train car. I was disturbed momentarily.

(stock footage)

Bosox won. Enough with the curse.

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Sentences

Listening to the Sea and Cake while you're busting your ass into the wind doesn't exactly get you going.

Listening to the Run Lola Run soundtrack seems to make the world move by faster...for about a song.

A tail wind ain't so bad, either.

I set up a chess club and we meet in two weeks for bi-monthly round robin action.

Back in high school, I set up a chess club in without (a) meeting with an administrator or (b) showing up to one meeting.

The chess playing teacher (and former prison dentist turned wrestling coach) who volunteered his time for this club refused his bonus check because nobody showed up.

I'm a horrible chess player.

The commuter who sat next to me this afternoon spent her entire ride on the train calling six different people to announce the pregnancy of her friend.

I snapped myself wide awake three times last night then had trouble waking up in the morning.

With the little effort I plan to spend on my Halloween costume, I expect it will be as awesome as the fork.

For Halloween in '01, I walked around and put checkmark stickers on people because I was a "Chinese Checker."

Did you laugh yet?

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A Weekend in October

In what could have been the last warm weekend of the year, I tried to go outside...twice, even. I took a few deep breaths as I enjoyed the air and thought to myself: "It's warm."

I retract that last statement knowing full well that it was 60 degrees on January 2nd of this year. Anything can happen.

- The culinary highlight of the weekend was the purchase of a deep fryer. As I purchased this item, I wondered to myself whether buying something that most people wait for their weddings to obtain was pathetic, or awesome. I didn't exactly need one, but it would be nice to fry eggrolls in a pot that won't stink up the place for a week. Instead, my apartment will stink for the next few days. After two uses, I wonder now if I can limit using the fryer to once a month. Oil is sort of fun to play with.

- Shoppers at Target can now impulse purchase that Arcade Fire album. It's conveniently placed at the registers along with Seals and Crofts and Steve Miller. That it appears the store is trying to move these units because of an overstock may back my opinion of the album...or not.

- I acquired this album. It turns out to be better than I expected. The arrangements are still beautiful and a little more upbeat. The lyrics aren't as depressing this time around...which is a nice break. They didn't push the stark juxtaposition of the two elements as hard, but I still like the way they use the formula.

- As I passed through south-central Wisconsin today, I noticed that the leaves have changed quite a bit. I still see a lot of green around here, so it was kind of a shock. Then I was shocked that I was shocked. Growing up in a subdivision next to a small forest, I always took the color change for granted. I guess the assimilation into city life continues.

- The city is littered with MANCOW billboards that depict renditions of popular rock albums from the '90's. It hit me today that these billboards are directly targeted at those who would recognize these covers. We're talking about people who were in their early college years or late high school years while this music was popular. I bet most people born before 1974 and after 1984 wouldn't immediately recognize the covers. I've never felt directly targeted by an ad before. It's a strange feeling...And it made me feel a little old. Those albums are on the verge of becoming classic rock.

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...and then I smirked

- I got a text message that claimed Johnny Damon used Nesticle's ability to 'save state' and 'load state' to hit that grand slam.

- The apartment building smelled like freshly cooked bacon when I got home.

- Every character in this this movie has an extremely fucked up life...and it's a comedy...and way too serious...unwatchable and entertaining...and I watched it without the subtitles.

- A 'gnarly' wave came out of Lake Michigan and threw a 10-foot high wall of water into the air and right at me as I rode through. The oncoming biker and I let out a simultaneous 'woo!' There seems to be a pattern here.

- My neighbor has two copies of Use Your Illusion II.

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Extremely Self-Absorbed Rant

It's about damn time. I was getting sick of seeing the Yankees in the world series every year. At the same time, I've been exposing myself to baseball way too much lately.

Awkward pauses were abound as I spoke to a few ladies at work today. During each pause they'd look at me and by the look in their eyes, It almost seemed like they were making fun of the facial hair in their minds. I just wasn't getting the usual look I get. On top of that, I caught the so-called 'elevator-eyes' on seperate occasions during these daytime conversations this week. I never noticed that happen to me before. I've been feeling self-conscious quite a bit lately and I'm not sure what's up with that. Ease used to be the name of my game. What gives?

Oh yeah...

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Aswlaekep

Recently, I've been too lazy to read during my commutes home. I usually waste the time dozing off a few minutes at a time. Each time I snapped awake this afternoon, I looked up to see a different person staring at me. It was unsettling.

I'm on the telephone machine a bit more these days while at the job. I'm not sure if I've always been socially inept, but I have no idea what passes for small talk these days. There has to be something other than weather and sports to kick conversations off. When asked "How's Chicago?" I have to stop myself from saying "Chicago is a city." That answer only works in person. Suggestions welcome.

Speaking of being socially inept, you'd think that a website meant to romantically match "Geeks" would feature HTML code similar to what you would have seen on the internet in 2000. Currently, the aforementioned site looks like an AOL homepage from 1997. All that is missing is a flying toaster and those stupid flying cupid graphics.

I'm pondering a retun of Leftover Chinese: The Beefcake Years ('98-'01). I think that era peaked when could bench 1.285 times my playing weight. These days, I'm a little heavier and much weaker. Since my legs won't let me snap off more than one jog on a weekly basis, I feel compelled to return to the process repeatedly picking things up and putting them down as a form of exercise. Is it worth the monthly fee?

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Linkage

Leftover Chinese doesn't read the blogs seen on your right as much as it should...but it would like to take a moment to point out a few things:

!) Ohio Snap turned into a hardcore politics website so gradually, I didn't even notice.

@) Soup let his domain expire.

$) Euro D really, really cares.

%) The little priest met her big crush.

^) Hellhound is not a web log. It's a time capsule.

&) Shug's father blew my cover in May and hasn't posted since.

*) Chicago Scum is garbage bag.

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The Weekend That Kept Going into Extra Innings

I managed to stay up past four a.m. both nights this weekend and am working towards waking up at 6:30 tomorrow. Somewhere in there rests a normal sleep pattern. Visit a Google image search of 'sleep'.

After leaving the house late on Friday, I came back home and extended my awake-time past 4am. Drinks were had, laughs were exchanged, and a few freestyling sessions were, um, put to digital format. The morning hangover told me that it was a good time. I didn't know that I could stay awake that late...but I think I'm starting to dislike alcohol.

My former roomate, Shug, came to town this weekend and we played the game on the video machine, watched the game on the television, and played the game at a park. Total baseball overload. As I type this...the damn sport is still on.

The fourth of four weddings this year went off without a hitch. The newlyweds exchanged their own vows during a ceremony that mixed some christian and jewish elements together. During this exchange, one of the newlyweds became choked up. I looked around the room and saw that the ladies in attendance joined in the tear parade. I don't think this would have happened if the bride was one who cried in happines. I award a "Congratulation!" to Joel and Liz.

After the wedding, I happened upon the hotel bar in the House of Blues hotel for a quick round. I walked past the cover-band playing the same tired shit and didn't think much of it as I ordered my eight dollar drink. Something sounded strangely familar about the way the cymbals sounded like shit. I took a closer look and saw my former drummer with his 'drummer face.' Apparently they drove all this way from Madison to entertain the traveling yuppie set. I tipped my glass, nodded to my old bandmate between songs, and took off feeling like I should get off my ass and start playing again. I've been putting this off for years now.

This movie is hilarious. The movie provides a pretty good commentary on America while the puppet sex is just a teaser for the two minutes of footage supposedly guaranteed to be on the DVD. I wasn't sold on the idea when I first heard about this movie, but it provides much entertainment. It will make you laugh at least once.

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Untitled

Since Sunday, I've been either sitting at home or sitting in a cubicle. Somehow that made me feel worn out and tired at 7pm tonight. Getting out to see a show tonight was the best thing for me to do. I think my hatred for live music has finally gone away.

During that I-pod commercial featuring U2, the band sounds a bit like Paris, Texas. I'm not sure how to interpret that.

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Week One or Week Five







More Narcissism courtesy of the moustache.

If you blinked last week, you probably missed it. Moustache Month is so cool, I'm growing two (2). This 'dirt-bag' stage of facial hair growth will be my date to a wedding on Saturday. The reject table won't see it coming.

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4 PM

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3 PM

All sixty-odd stories of my office building were evacuated this afternoon due to a dihydrogen monoxide crisis. From the outside, you could see water flowing down the side of the building. In my industry, the phrase "Class A building, my ass" comes to mind. Millions of dollars in production are probably lost. The Man can't buy a new engine for the boat he got last year...yet. As it stands, I got three hours to kill and nobody to fuck. This is as close to a snow day I will ever get. How do I kill this free time?

[ ] None of the below
[ ] Bike to the lake. Sit and stare at the water. Ride back.
[ ] DVD Viewing
[ ] Some of the Middle
[ ] Coin a platinum hit with all that unused music gear.
[ ] Video Games
[ ] All of the Above

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Title

Self-indulgent topic sentence. Supporting sentence. Supporting sentence. Tangental information. Another self-indulgent observation. Sarcastic remark. Rhetorical question.

Introduction to situation. First event. Second event. Initial theory. Third event. Cynical observation. Self-depricating comment. Attempt to relate to audience, if any. Sarcastic remark. Finish with "..."

One-sentence summary or random fact.

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Should be the Norm

A year ago this time, I was creaking around the apartment in pain from running 13.1 miles of the Chicago Marathon. This year I slept long enough to wake up to a Sunday sports overload. I had to break up the overload with a first-time full viewing of "How High." That movie seems a lot worse now knowing that that the sitcom project failed.

I skipped catching any of the marathon this year. I recall a few miles last year being pretty boring. Watching myself run by with a disinterested look on my face doesn't qualify as entertainment. Seeing the loonies as you ran the course was a little more fun. Perhaps next year.

That Arcade Fire album is merely so-so. After the first two tracks the album falls flat. They set you up for what appears to be a great album, then they suddenly retreat. On the plus side, the person who gave me this CD dropped a sweet Cee-Lo green song at the end. Awesome finish notwithstanding, I guess not all Canadian bands can put out the winners.

On the other hand, the Futureheads album is pretty decent. Go Indie-Prog.

Wanted: Somebody to show me how to press a button-down shirt.

I found myself in Hanover Park, IL last night at a classic Filipino gathering of relatives on my mother's side of the family. Plates of food were eaten, greetings were exchanged, and I took home a plate of leftovers and a lot of freshly rolled egg-rolls (for me to fry at my discretion). As an added bonus, parents and relatives started bugging me about being single so that cousins of my mom could suggest I hook up with an immigrant filipina nurse. Somewhere in there, an uncle tossed out a 'white girl' comment and my dad widened his preferred candidate scope to Mestizas. After that conversation, I deemed the party to be classic broken record action. It's nice to see that some things never change.

To the lady whom almost drove head-first into me on the bike path. That was a sweet "Whoo!" you let out when you decided to pay attention to where you were going. You sounded like you were at a rock concert.

The bikeride means I did my 20 miles/week plan for the first time since June. Six by the jog, fourteen by the pedal. I bet I can do this every week. Wait. It's almost winter.

Why do I always feel compelled to clean my apartment when I actually spend time at home on a weekend? Why do I always feel compelled to do that cleaning five minutes before I go out?

The Nu-metal cover of Phil Collins' "In the Air Tonight" is being used during Fox baseball telecasts. The band made the song worse. Nu-metal is the new Michael McDonald.

Also wanted: A 2005 adventure in Manila...or London. I should probably pass my balanced budged act before my personal deadline.

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The Misteak...haha! get it?

I ordered the steak medium rare. I watched that thing sit under the heat lamps for over five minutes. During the server days, I learned that a steak sitting under the heat lamp can go from barely alive to well-done fairly quickly. Ordering another one would have been asking for more punishment, so I ate it. I demand a re-do.

Former Milwaukee Brewer players currently in the playoffs:

- Mike Matheny (STL)
- Cal Eldred (STL)
- Henry Blanco (MIN)
- Jose Hernandez (LA)
- Gary Sheffield (NYY)
- Eddie Perez (ATL)
- Julio Franco (ATL)
- Ray King (ATL)
- Curtis Leskanic (BOS)
- Dale Sveum (BOS - Coach)
- Terry Francona (BOS - Manager)

I hope you enjoy the most pointless fact you'll learn this week. Use it wisely.

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Week Zero






Due to circumstances completely within my control, the festival we call Moustache month was given a restart. Something told me that I should take the cut to benefit the interests of corporate face judging. Can I grow another one by the end of the month?

Other questions:
!. I have one more poster frame to use and one last place to put it. What shall be placed inside the frame?
@. Was my afternoon run fairly easy because I ran only two days ago? Or was it because I had a sandwhich mid-afternoon?
#. I'm at the point in my DVD rental queue where I get DVD's that I normally wouldn't watch. What should I be putting on my queue?
$. Why do those Damn Yankees pull the same shit every postseason?
%. Why did I wake up at 4:30 this morning?

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Fall Television Schedule

This is the month I watch the most television. I like TV this time of year so much that I can predict the schedule ahead of time. Stay Tuned for my Fall TV viewing schedule and place your bets:

Division Series:

> LA/STL
> Cardinals in 5
> HOU/ATL
> Astros in 4
> BOS/ANA
> Red Sox in 5
> NYY/MIN
> Twins in 4

League Championship Series:
> STL/HOU
> Cards in 5
> MIN/BOS
> Red Sox in 6

2004 World Series Champions:
> STL/BOS
> Cards in 7

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again?

It pierced through my headphones as I ate my lunch. I looked up and at first, I didn't know why. Then I realized that for the second time in three days, David Lee Roth's "Just a Gigolo" was on the radio. Being in public, I strained to listen for the station to announce itself. I didn't get it...but I did get Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" I thought it to be a strange coincidence for a variety of reasons. Why is this amazing radio playlist following me around?

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The Weekend I Went Home

The second attempt in less than a week to reach the hometown was a success. Meals were had, laughs were shared, people got married, and I drove there and back. All in all I would have to say: it was a weekend spent in my hometown.

- Heading back to the homestead, I drove my passengers to the local high school during the end of the annual homecoming football game. I was expecting to have bad flashbacks as I drove through the parking lot, but the pouring rain spared me. I don't think I had any humiliating moments in the rain.

- Saturday Morning Scene: The Car:

M: "They took my Delilah station away."
E: "What do you mean?"
M: "I don't know, when to go to the station the show is gone."
E: "You mean they cancelled Delilah?"
M: "No, her show is still on, but I think Milwaukee dumped it, the station changed."
E: "Really? Let me see here."
* Change radio station. David Lee Roth's "Just a Gigolo" happens to be on*
E: "Whaaaaa?"
- end scene -

I didn't think I'd ever hear that song over air...ever. The station then followed up with Led Zeppelin's 'Black Dog.' It was as if they took my record collection from high school and made it a radio station. Something tells me a format like that won't last. Once they replace the robots with actual DJ's that format will homogenize like whoa.

- Another couple from 'Leftover Chinese: The Saved by the Bell Years' tied the knot this weekend. The lovely couple met in high school and were able to forge the type of relationship to last a lifetime. All the years of joy and happiness culminated in the following approximate timeline as seen by me:

3:58pm: Sit in third row, wonder if the seats are taken. Scan the room and look for familiar faces. Smile and nod when eyes meet.
4:02pm: A couple marches in silence down the aisle and gets halfway to the front before people realize that the ceremony started.
4:05pm: Bride does her march, we all stand.
4:10pm: Vows are exchanged.
4:15pm: The country club's Grandfather Clock rings.
4:18pm: Rings are placed on the fingers.
4:19pm: All parties involved in the ceremony walk off.
4:20pm: I glance at my watch and I hear an old lady say aloud: "That's it?!"
4:21pm: Consensus reached on how much we truly enjoyed the quick ceremony. Now they get to go to Vegas for the real wedding ceremony.

- Wedding #3 of the season was a hoot. I faced an open bar for six out of eight hours, a gathering of many old and new friends, and my three-week old experiment in social drinking. I made the drive home feeling satisfied by the good time. It turned out to be a pretty fun night.

- Unfortunately, very few of my pictures turned out. I hate this camera.

- My moustache scared one of my nieces away today. When I kept clean, she was always looking for it. Now that it's back...she's freaked out and wants no part of me. Does the word 'instinct' pop into your mind?

- I met a few friends of the couple whom mentioned this site. That means friends of friends, many of whom are strangers, make an occasional visit. To the new Strangers: Hi. Welcome to the Internet version of "That guy your friend talked about that one time."

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